And now to thirty-three weeks! Wow, thirty-three weeks! I know I will always be saying this every week, but I blink and the week is over (and I swear I was just looking at him and thinking how old he is getting!!!)…but I can swear that the last five hours of tonight felt like five days…no joke. It has been one of those days and I am thankful that God’s mercies are new every morning. I think Sam is teething again…and he is such a brutal teether that I think I may lose my mind. I am starting to rethink having a baby born with a full set of teeth – it now sounds like a fairly good idea…a creepy idea, but a good idea nonetheless. I do feel bad for him…I would think it is very painful to get teeth…obviously, I went through it at some point in my life because I have teeth, but I have no memory of it. However, I can say that I have suffered much pain post teeth…darned teeth always causing problems. I am praying I can show him some compassion this week rather than focus on myself and my hair (because I am going to pull out every last stitch of it while I go crazy)! Teeth come quickly!
So, what did week thirty-three bring for Sammy? Well, obviously I think it is bringing teeth…big ol’ nasty, mean front teeth. And time will tell…I am sure it will be some time before those big, bad teeth arrive. And I am praying that I have a happy heart about it – easier said than done. Sammy enjoyed his oldest brother’s bday celebration and I have learned that Sammy LOVES balloons, but they have to be attached to something because when they are loose, they get away from Sammy and gets mad…like spit fire I am going to burn your house down mad. So, keep the balloons secure. He can have quite the feisty temper…it is showing more and more every week and so, I am getting more and more scared! He is so busy – he can never ever sit still. Even when he is nursing in the early morning (and he is still tired), he has to be moving his arms and legs constantly.
He is also starting to think that he is a big boy like his brothers – he brings himself over to the table and tries to pull himself up, which normally ends in a header and lots of tears. He also thinks he can crawl…but he can’t do that either…it is more than just thinking you can do something, you actually have to be able to do it…he hasn’t gotten that memo yet. He still likes to get on his knees and rock himself, but he has no idea what he is doing and for that I am thankful. I am still in no hurry to get him mobile and I think he will be my biggest terror yet! A sweet terror and cute as can be…but a terror! However, I know that he so desperately wants to crawl and I know it would bring him so much joy, so for those reasons I want him to be mobile (and I cringe). Even though he cannot crawl, he gets what he wants and where he wants to go. He will stay happy for some time playing with his toys on the floor, but I can tell he would like his big brothers’ toys. I think he is nursing better this week, but this boy is just a rough eater – not so different than his oldest brother. I do not have good eaters – I can try and pretend like I do, but I don’t. However, he did eat an entire baby food container at one sitting this morning…that is a big deal. I guess he likes sweet potatoes and corn. We have pretty much thrown all food rules out the window and are giving him everything…so irresponsible.
He is still sleeping like junk, but I did get to sleep for six hours straight one night this week and that was AH-MAZING! I praise God for blessing me with that sleep – it had been a rough week and an especially rough night the night before (darned food poisoning) and it is going to be a long week, so that sleep came at the perfect time. Hopeful, I’ll see more of that sleep in my future…a girl can dream. I have tried a bit of the “working it out” this week – this kid is tough…oh.my.word. Sad. As much as I can have my moments (oh boy, are there some moments)…this little guy can give me the biggest smiles that just melt my heart. And, oh my does he need me…like I need cake, he needs me – and he reaches for me and gives me these big, sad eyes and oh, I cannot resist him. And I just want him to know how much I love him even when I cannot pick him up every last second of the day – I want him to know that I love him with this fierce love. I am a blessed Mama – God is too kind to me.
I am bracing myself for a VERY long week. Honestly, I am not sure how long I will last if every day is like today…but then I remember that God is my rock and my strength. And I know I will get through this week. I do pray that my heart will be softened to my children and I love them with the same love Christ has shown me. It is so hard – I am sinner…and so are the littles in my home. But, I am their witness for Christ, so I better act like it. Lord, meet me in the hard spots and guide my steps. Help me to drop the little things and focus on the hearts of my sweet boys. Help me to relax and remember that my time is limited. Help me to cherish every day and constantly lead me to the cross. Amen.