Sunday, November 25, 2012

Happy Thanksgiving!

Happy Thanksgiving in week thirty-seven for Sammy!  He had a wonderful first Thanksgiving with lots of family...and lots of driving.  Sadly, he was sleeping during the meals at both Thanksgiving and he did not partake in any overindulging...but don't worry, I did enough for the both of us.  After Thanksgiving, we were able to spend the weekend in Flagstaff with Jake's family and it was awesome.  We had Mexican Thanksgiving...and once again, I ate enough to last me for days...and I am officially on a Mexican food boycott...until I see some chips and salsa.  He enjoyed the Flagstaff trip - especially the dog and all the exploring.  I would say the first Thanksgiving was a success. 

So, what did week thirty-seven bring for Sammy?  Well, it brought a happier baby...yay!!!  I think he is pulling out of his forever teething...which, of course, is a total lie because he still only has two teeth with the other two coming soon (I swear), I know more teething is right around the corner, but I'll take this reprieve while I can.  His sleeping has been somewhat better...I actually think I got more than a five hour stretch of sleep (however, part of the reason I don't get more sleep is because I stay up too dang late…again, the three kids is the tipping point…added a third child and I stay up an extra two hours at night).  We started noticing some blisters on his skin near his diaper area that we assumed was a bad diaper rash...well, of course, I consulted the “all knowing” Google and we learned it could be a staph infection.  Ok, you should have seen the look on Jake's face when I said staph infection...priceless.  Honestly, I can't blame him...the only staph infections we have known have been bad news.  Well, as always, Google was right...Sammy has a staph infection, which we have learned isn't that big of a deal...who knew?!?  He is on some strong antibiotics to fight it and hopefully it goes away soon.  Sadly, the antibiotics hurt his little tummy...poor buddy and affect his sleeping...oh joy.  Let's just say our last night in Flag was rough.  He is still struggling with eating, and we are working to always make sure he eats enough...we know this drill oh so well.  He has been doing well with solids and really prefers to feed himself...with his fists, it is ugly.  His fave is frozen blueberries.  

I have been on the search again for the "elusive" best schedule for a baby.  I went on this same search with Judah and I swore I would write it down when I found it...clearly, that didn't happen (the writing down of the perfect schedule or the actual perfect schedule).  Sammy is now on an eat/sleep/wake schedule...basically, the one all of our kids have been on.  As much as we dream of those Babywise babies, we do not have them...Sammy is no exception.  He won't take more than four ounces in the morning, so we have to feed him before his nap...which starts the cycle.  Oh, well.  I don't claim to have the best sleepers (that is for sure), but we still have three great, I just have to embrace my "non" schedule...which gives me the shakes a little bit.  Sam had a busy week with trips to the Zoo and Children's would have thought it was Christmas when I let him down at the Children's Museum.  He is getting more and more mobile...he is also getting faster.  He struggled a bit figuring out crawling on new surfaces, so he started like this bear crawl thing and thought he could just stand up...well, he can't...and he learned that...ouch.  He has been trying to pull himself up more and more.  He loves playing with toys...his brothers' toys.  Legos are his favorite.  Why I get baby toys I do not know.  He continues to be SUPER vocal and LOVES to shake his head "no" at you.  I have seen he and Judah interact more...Judah wants to play with  I want my boys to be the best of friends.  He has found a love for clapping…he likes to clap at everything…he gets a toy, he claps…he spits his food out, he claps…he hears me speaking loudly to his brothers, he claps…he pees on Daddy, he claps…like I said, he has a love for clapping…and he is quite good at it.  It has been a busy week and lots of fun, and this week it has been such a blessing to have our super smiley and laughing baby back...nice to have a happy baby. 

I really feel like God has been showing me lots these last couple of weeks...I feel like I haven't been so focused on only having a good attitude when everything is going my way....of course, easy to say when Sam has had a better week.  I am praying God continues to reveal my sin of selfishness and putting my needs steps.  Guess I am not perfect...shocking!  Thankful for another great week and a very happy Thanksgiving!

Sunday, November 18, 2012

Hunger Strike!

Thirty-six weeks!  Our little Sammy Lammy is thirty-six weeks!  Sammy Lammy has had a ROUGH week thirty-six…cold, teething, hunger strike…you name it and Sammy has embraced it.  I feel bad for him…but to be honest, it has been more of a pity party for me this week and I have felt worse for myself…just being honest.  It has been a hard week…but in spite of it being a hard week, it has been a fun week with lots of smiles and giggles.  He cannot get enough of me biting his ears, toes, and fingers…he pretty much loves it…sweet boy.  So, I’ll take the hard week with the sweet cuddles and smiles.

So, what did week thirty-six bring for Sammy?  It continues to bring moving…he is crawling on the wood now and doesn’t slip all over.  He is still really slow, but it is just a matter of time before he is a master at it.  He is pulling himself up more and thinks he is pretty cool when he stands up, but he is not sturdy at all, which is fine by me.  I am a crawling nazi and firmly believe that my babies must have perfect crawls before they ever consider walking.  And, I am not crazy about this…crawling is linked to so many brain issues it is unreal…so, I like to see a perfect crawl and I will help them to get there if needed.  Ok, enough with my crawling rant.  He had a visit to the zoo this week…he seemed to dig it.  He continues to love swinging on swings.  He gets spitting mad when you take anything away from him…especially my cell phone.  We packed up the Bumbo and his little toy corner (where I use to confine him…those days are long over).  His favorite food is frozen blueberries (glad he eats something).  This week finally brought some healing from his cold…but not 100%.  My boys love to hold onto to their colds…lucky me.  I swore he had an ear infection this week, and after one expensive doctor visit...he has a cold and is teething (thank you doctor, I would be lost without you)…I became one of those moms…oh well.  He is teething…the top two are busting through, and I think we are all safe to say that Sam is one miserable teether.  Ay yai yai…I think I might lose my mind.  And, if we ever have another baby…I want it with a full set of teeth…it would be totally creepy at first, but I would be thankful later and by eighteen months, it would totally be normal.   

So, he is also on a total hunger strike…and if you want one thing that is going to make me crazy (ok, there are lots of things that make me crazy, but this one really makes me crazy), it is when a baby doesn’t eat.  And now that he is on bottles, I know every last ounce that this baby drinks…every.last.single.ounce.  Or, I should say every last single ounce he doesn’t drink.  (But you know what, it is good to know he isn’t just a boob hater…he is a total milk hater!)  Seriously, he can go twelve hours without eating and he still doesn’t want to eat…what baby is like that?!?  Oh, wait…his big brother…duh.  So, here is where my crazy enters the scene…I think Sam has the same issues as Hugh.  BUT, I believe it is just how our kids are made and it isn’t a big deal…just makes eating difficult.  I could be totally wrong…who knows.  I am not going to worry about it (ha, ha...yeah, right)…just going to embrace a baby that eats when he wants…which happens to be when he is sleepy or sleeping…which of course leads to his terrible sleeping.  Sleep is hard to come by in this house…very hard to come by.  This is definitely our lot in life…no sleep and non-eating baby.  And obviously, the teething has made him SUPER fussy…  BUT, what I have really learned about myself is…I am such a whiner and complainer…  It is like I expect to have these babies and expect them to be self-sufficient by six months.  Wow oh wow…I have seen so much sin in my heart it is frightening.  So, instead of praying that Sam would have a better week, I pray I would have a heart focused on Christ and serving my boys rather than on myself (I am sure that is much easier to type than to practice). 

 Praying for a better week…for my heart.  I want to be thankful for every season God has given me.  I want to listen to the words I preach to my boys ALL day long…Philippians 2:14, “Do all things without complaining or disputing.”  I want my boys to see me live out the gospel…a little hard to do when I am complaining all day…sad.  Thankful God is patient.

Monday, November 12, 2012

On the Go...

Thirty-five weeks, here we come!  Already another week done.  Seriously, time is flying by – it is unreal.  I swear I thought time stood still when I was a kid…especially in the long, hot summers where if I thought if I swam another day, I was going to turn into a fish (I would spend like fifteen hours a day in the pool……by myself…where was my mother?!?)…and now, I feel like I never have a spare minute (but once again, time always stands still when I am nursing, pumping, or working out) to think.  I feel like the more kids we have, the faster time seems to fly by…time is really going to fly when we are on number six (kidding, neva gonna happen).  As always, I wish I could hit pause on all the sweet moments…and hit fast forward on the crying, whining, bickering, fighting, etc., etc., etc.  Ok, back to this blog being about Sam and not my crazy mom moments (because I am totally becoming one of those moms…I actually spit on my finger to clean Hugh’s face the other day…what is wrong with me?!?).  My baby is thirty-five weeks and becoming less and less of a baby each day.  His need for independence is shocking, but he is also still totally dependent upon me and makes it known most of the day (sigh).  He’ll always be my baby.

So, what did week thirty-five bring for Sammy?  Well, it is official…he can crawl.  He now holds the title in the house for the earliest crawl…now, he isn’t great at it, but it is a crawl nonetheless.  And, I am scared to death.  Ugh.  I am not ready for another mobile child in this house.  I feel like two mobile children is enough.  And he is curious about everything.  Absolutely everything.  So, gone are the days of me setting him down and walking away, guess I will need to man-up and start parenting now…so, I actually have to watch him?!?  Fortunately, he is nowhere near ready to start mastering stairs, but I am sure he’ll surprise me next week…ugh.  But you know what, he is so happy he can move…like really, really happy and that makes me smile.  His brothers seem to be fine with him moving and taking their things because Sam is really slow still…give it a few weeks and it will be one more thing they’ll start whining about (sorry, been one of those days with the constant fighting and “I’m gonna tell Mom”…making my ears bleed).  Today, he pulled himself up for the first time all by himself…and he was so proud, like he conquered the world…good for him, not for me.  I am sure this next week will have lots of bruises and lots of tears.   

He also got his first cold this week (he is still in the middle of it, and I am sick as well…bummer).  It has been rough…he doesn’t do sickness well (reminds me of his Daddy).  I feel so bad for him, he is miserable being so congested. He HATES the nose sucker and the saline spray – you would think I was killing him…poor buddy.  And, of course this puts us back to square one with his sleeping…sad.  He is up a lot of the night – Jake (best husband in the world) stayed up with him one night and slept with him in the rocker…those two have a SPECIAL relationship.  I am hoping we can get past this cold and I am really hoping this is not a glimpse into our season…that would be no bueno.  I just don’t want him to be so miserable…and I want to sleep…no joke.  We have pretty much stopped baby food since he just shakes his head at us, yes, he has learned to shake his head “no”…so great.  He likes to eat with us, but it is still such a mess and I think he actually only gets about ten percent into his mouth.  We are still working on the signs with him…and he still laughs at us.  He still loves his time in the shower – I think he could sit in there all day, but we found out he likes the bath even more…such a water baby.  He is such a sweetheart (even more so when he is healthy) and we love him so much.  What an incredible blessing we have been given!

So, I made the decision to stop nursing this past week…I just decided and it felt right.  I thought I would have this time of mourning, but I didn’t…not for one single minute.  Now, I will still nurse him every once in a while…the middle of the night or the morning feeding when I know he’ll nurse well, but for the most part, I am done.  However, I am pumping, and for now, I want to pump (I still want boobs.).  The sad thing is, my production sucks…but I am not use to pumping this late in the game.  And…it hurts like the dickens to have so many pumping sessions a day again.  Truth be told, that pump is mean and nasty…Sammy was a sweetheart…teeth and all.  So, now to decide what bottles to use (yes, that is a discussion in our house…we live exciting lives).  I am at peace with the decision, but I do hate washing all the pieces again…ugh.  Guessing the pumping gig will be short lived, but who knows?  Glad that God meets us in our struggles…even the silly ones like pumping versus nursing (my constant dilemma!).

Monday, November 5, 2012

Another week...

Sammy is thirty-four weeks!  He’ll be eight months by weeks end…what?!?  How did that happen?!?  How is my little baby going to be eight months old?  It is crazy to think he’ll be a year before I know it, and I know these next two months are going to fly by since we are entering crazy holiday time…ahh!!!  I am praying I enjoy every week…even the really hard weeks.  I know I’ll look back on this time and miss it, so I pray I treasure the moments I have.  God has blessed us so much!  We are so thankful!

So, what did week thirty-four bring for Sammy?  Well, it brought another week of Jake being gone…Jake has missed more than three weeks of this baby’s life…not that anyone is counting.  And, I keep storing up treasures in heaven…yes, I do…Saint Jenn for sure.  We all survived and I know Sammy missed Jake terribly.  He is becoming quite the Daddy’s boy (that should not come as a big shock to anyone…Jake owns the keys to all of his boys’ hearts) and even reached out for Jake this week (however, it should be noted he has been reaching for me for weeks…just sayin’).  We are all very thankful to have Daddy home!  (And, I am so thankful to no longer be showering with all of my boys…what was I thinking?!? I do not know…I blame it on lack of sleep.)  Sammy has learned a few new tricks this week.  Number one, he likes to spit…oh joy.  Why babies think spitting is so cool is beyond me.  Newsflash, it is gross…stop doing it.  I am hoping the spitting is a short phase…but I know it will not be…sigh.  He has also learned to put himself back into a sitting position…he only does this in the crib.  Kind of like how he only rolls from tummy to back…it is a crib thing.  I am not sure if he thinks he needs to perfect all his moves before he brings them to the public?!?  Guess what, buddy…we have a camera and we watch your every move so we know all your tricks.  I swear I heard him say “Mama”…but it has been when he is really mad.  The boys always say “Dada” when they are loving on him and having fun, and scream “Mama” in this painful “you better listen” sort of way…love it.  He pulled himself up on Jake…only happened once and I didn’t see it…so, I am not really sure if it happened or not, but I guess I’ll take Jake’s word.  I know he so wants to be mobile…I am actually getting sad for him.  I think the saddest part is he thinks he can do it, but he really can’t…poor buddy.  However, I am guessing the true crawling has to be right around the corner now that he can get into a sitting position…I’ll have to watch for it in the crib as I am sure he will start crawling in there first.  

He started sleeping a little better towards the end of the week.  Of course, he started sleeping better right when Jake gets back into town…the whole time while Jake was gone, it was his worst sleep since he was a newborn.  I am hoping he is turning a corner and will start sleeping well at night…a girl can hope.  He is still having a really hard time at night and won’t take that third nap of the day (see me banging my head against the wall)…the last few hours of the day are painful.  He is still eating ok – nothing amazing.  I tried pears pureed this week and that was a big no go – I tried all my tricks to try and get him to open his mouth and it was not happening – no way, no how.  He likes to be independent when he eats…that is good.  We are starting the baby signs with him…he just laughs at me when I sign all done.  He enjoyed his first time on a swing…even when his brothers were pushing him all around…however, I think he stopped enjoying the swing ride when he started choking (not sure he is quite big enough or stable for the swing…lesson learned).  He celebrated his first Halloween and he had a good attitude (despite running a fever…poor buddy…darned teeth!!!).  I was thankful for friends willing to haul him around because he wasn’t really having the stroller.  He made one cute puppy.  This little guy is as cute as can be…seriously.  He gets cuter and cuter every day.  He has the best half smiles I have ever seen and he can melt my heart every time with his sweet smile or giggle…even when he is driving me crazy!!!

So, I am a survivor (think BeyoncĂ©) and I can do this mom thing…shoot, this is my third time around, of course I can do this mom thing…then why is breastfeeding/feeding such a struggle?!?  Why is there so much dang mom guilt when you start thinking you are going to give up breastfeeding?  Nursing Sammy is painful (not in the ouch this really hurts kind of way (well sort of but it is not terrible), but painful in the he is driving me crazy kind of way)…he is a terrible eater…honestly; I don’t think it matters…breast or bottle…this kid hasn’t met a nipple he liked!  Obviously, he eats…but it is a long, painful process…sigh.  So, I am really wrestling with continuing to breastfeed…my goal is nine months…so I am so close, but I don’t think I can do it for another month and pumping sounds super fun…ugh.  I wish I had this same perseverance when it came to working out…I would look like Heidi Klum.  I know I will make it to nine months…baby steps…also, if I quit now, my ladies will disappear (like seriously disappear…and look uglier than ever…gives me nightmares) and that would make me sad…I know, it is sad…I breastfeed to have boobs (true story).  One day at a time!