Saturday, February 15, 2014

I Don't Remember

Thirteen weeks and three months for our big boy, Maxime! Sad to title a blog "I Don't Remember"...but I really don't remember last week...sad. The weeks fly by (except Thursdays...Thursdays seem to really drag). Anyway, and then we get to Friday and I can barely remember what happened during the week. I do remember that I forgot to pick Hugh up from school on Friday...thankfully, he was fine. I felt horrible, but he didn't even know I forgot to pick him up...sweet boy. So, maybe that event scratched all memories of the week...who knows. I will remember Max's thirteenth week of life...I know I can do it (but I definitely need more sleep!...but I cannot blame Max for my lack of is all Jake's fault).

So, what did week thirteen bring for Max? I don't remember. Kidding. He received his passport in the that means we'll be going home (well, home for Jake and me...Switzerland will feel more like home for the boys) at some point very soon...yay! Processed foods and red dye 40 here I come!!! It will be nice to go home...Max won't remember it. I finally feel like we turned a corner this week and he is going down so much easier at night! It is so nice. Honestly, I think we could put him to bed earlier than we do (he normally goes down around 8:30), but nights are so chaotic and I think it is actually easier having him up then removing one of us from putting the other three monkeys to bed. And, he is still taking the third nap of the day. Once he drops his third nap, I think we'll put him to bed earlier. He is still hit or miss on his naps and will almost always cry out at some point during his naps...we are working on it. My sanity is based upon my boys having decent nap schedules. When people tell me their two year-olds don't nap any longer, I get hives...seriously. Neva.gonna.happen. My boys need naps! Well, I need them to nap. So, I will work out Max's naps...I am sure sometimes a three hour nap isn't realistic, but with a little hard work anything can happen. He has started to extend his wake time...about ninety minutes now. I finally feel like we have a really good schedule going on...I am sure he will hit a growth spurt next week and everything will get jacked up. He has been a little fickle with his nursing this week, which drives me crazy. I am a get it done kind of girl when it comes to nursing...Max not so much. He also still almost always falls asleep while nursing...I thought for sure that would have ended by now...guess not. We still have not secured a giggle from this sweet boy. He is really making us work for it. We think he has his first cold...or something. He has a yucky cough, but it doesn't seem to bother him. Max has always had a cough - since birth. We are not sure what it is...his doctor thinks it might be reflux...who knows. Hoping this cough/cold don't bother him for too long. (It definitely bothers Jake...Jake has really chilled when it comes to the boys...but his baby baby having a cough is no bueno for Jake.) I officially packed up all the zero to three month hurts my heart. Oh, I am going to miss this. So.much. I actually want Max to stop growing. Three months is the best age...why can't he just stay three months forever?!? Seriously, Max makes me almost want to put my lady bits back together (ok, not really)...but I wish everyone could have a Max for a sweet. (I realized when I was putting away the clothes that I can count on one hand the number of times Max has worn anything other than a sleeper...I know, that is a little sad...we both have our outfits of choice...sleeper onesie for him and elastic waistbands for me...awesome.). He still gives lots of smiles and lots of talking. He will just stare at me with the sweetest smile...cannot get enough of this little guy. He is still spending a lot of time in the Bumbo and on his wonky playmat (the old playmat we had was SO much better...this one is wonky, but a gift is a gift and it is better than nothing...and his older brothers really seem to enjoy it). He seems like he is trying to reach out for things, but is still in that phase where he doesn't quite know how his arms actually work. We have started keeping his legs out of the Woombie...he still is rocking the startle reflex, so his arms are staying wrapped up. I started to notice today that he is getting a little big for the rock and play sleeper...and I almost (emphasis on almost) put him in the crib...but if ain't broke, don't fix it. Need to pull the trigger on the crib...but not this week...needs to stay upright with that cough (at least that is what I am telling myself to put it off another week). It will be a little weird to start packing up all the baby gear. Not ready for that...definitely not trying to fast forward through this last baby. I'll take the sweet cuddles, the finger holding, the night rocking for as long as I can!

I have been very convicted lately about being intentional with my boys and getting in the down and dirty with them. This can go against everything I believe in at times. I know I don't want to raise robots, but sometimes I want robots...with off switches. I see God working on my heart bit by bit everyday. I am so thankful for the grace He has shown me these last few months. I know it is only through Him that I can find peace. I laugh at times thinking how discontent I would be in Phoenix with the situation I have here...only getting out of the house for like three hours a week (seriously...and that is only if all babies are healthy and I can go to church). I have such a peace about it (I definitely have some days...crazy days...where the peace runs out)...but God has me right where He wants me and I wouldn't want it any other way. I pray that I use the time with my boys in an intentional way...getting to their level and loving them there. I don't want to miss this...there is no going back.